The Heartless Muse by Danil Rudoy

Grabbing the gunned and guarded,
Making a twisted blend…
Where do I even start it?
How do I even end?
Should I perhaps already
Quit… but it is too late:
Such an erratic steady’s
Nothing to adumbrate.

I’ve gone in all directions,
Putting on empty shelves
Mirrors with bent reflections
Of our two crooked selves.
Now I curtail the pendants:
Time will be not enough
To overcome the remnants
Of an unheard-of love.

Maybe I’m too exacting?
Maybe I’m simply wrong?
Given from birth to acting,
Facing the lasting throng,
I am a harsh director
Staging a shattered dream,
Taught by the grasp to vector
Consciousness to a stream.

Set it alight, my duchess;
Make this virage a verse.
You are the fuel, and such is
Your venerated hearse.
You are becoming nervous:
Why, fear is always rife.
Is there a better purpose
For an unequaled life?

What is it that is dear
In a predicted game?
Stop, you will never near
All you’re about to name.
Down with the coy concealment,
Down with the would-be past:
Pause the delusive film and
Look at yourself, at last.

Drunk and becoming drunker,
Sniffing the stuffy air;
Head is a ruined bunker,
Eyes are a single stare,
Mood is a constant hazard…
What an emphatic queen
For a domain I’ve gathered,
Conquered, but never seen!

Clenching a gobbled goblet,
Always prepared to suck
Every provided droplet
Of uncontested luck;
Drowning, of course, but, really,
Keeping the hope afloat,
So unprepared to freely
Sail in a handy boat;

Biting your tail that’s hanging
Down to the earthly realm;
Sleeping alone or banging
Shadows that overwhelm;
Going from wry to sour,
Did you at least believe
In the tremendous power
Hiding within your sleeve?

Menacing like a hornet,
Cynical like a whore,
You will pretend to scorn it,
But will return for more,
Chasing, a lonesome ripple,
Fantasies: to rehearse
How you collect from people
What you consider yours:

Everything! No surprises.
Where is it, though? Alas,
Every majestic prize is
Lost in the looking glass
Like, in a loop of folly,
Royalties overdue…
Well, did you hear it, Molly?
This one was just for you.